


Pieces of the Soul 2: Reconnection

by TriplePirouette



Series: Pieces of the Soul [2]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-13
Updated: 2012-11-13
Packaged: 2017-11-18 14:34:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/562110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TriplePirouette/pseuds/TriplePirouette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She's found him...but how does he react?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pieces of the Soul 2: Reconnection

**Author's Note:**

> This work was originally posted on January 24, 2003 under a different name. I have since changed to Triple Pirouette and I am posting for archival purposes and have not edited or otherwise changed anything about this story since then, including the rest of the author notes. -3P
> 
> Key Words: Post- ep William, MSR, some Scully POV
> 
> Rated: PG
> 
> Spoilers: Up to William, after that it veers off into my own little  
> universe.You MIGHT want to read Pieces of the Soul to understand  
> this;) But forget about Jump the Shark- that NEVER took place in my  
> mind. LONG LIVE THE LONE GUNMEN!
> 
> Disclaimer: No they're not mine- oh, but if they were! Well, it's OK  
> now, though, because we've learned CC's the biggest 'shipper of us  
> all!
> 
> Dedication: to Leslie who ALWAYS asks for more.... and smut ;)
    
    
    XxXxXxXx
    
    247 Lanark Road. Milwalkie, Wisconsin.
    
    She had found it.
    
    Or so she believed.
    
    She'd been standing outside so long, clinging to the tiny sheet of
    paper that she wasn't even sure she could feel her hand anymore. Her
    thin windbreaker did nothing for the unseasonable chill that crept
    through her. Her hair was messy, greasy and unkempt. Her eyes were
    bloodshot and welled with tears.
    
    He could be right inside, watching the news.
    
    Or he could be a million miles away.
    
    She was not ready to face the second possibility. She had been living
    out of her duffel bag for the last four weeks, sleeping in the
    dilapidated car she had bought for practically nothing, washing her
    clothes at laundromats and letting them dry on the back seat as she
    followed the next lead. She felt hardened and like a vagrant.
    
    Twice she had woken up to nosebleeds and prayed to God that it was
    only the cold air irritating her nose. But she knew she was running
    out of time. She had made a promise to herself one of the cold nights
    where she could swear she was face to face with death of frostbite.
    She promised herself that if he weren't here, she'd go back and get
    better, then try again. No matter how determined she was, she couldn't
    find him dead. And she knew he was still alive.
    
    He was still alive because he was moving. Whether he found out someone
    was on his trail, or he just constantly kept moving, she was missing
    him by days, even hours at one point. He was alive, and with a little
    more preparation, she could have caught him that first night. Now, she
    was four weeks into her journey, and she was tired. No matter how much
    she wanted it, she couldn't kill herself for him, not if he was still
    alive, and she could still see him.
    
    So, for now, this was her last chance... One last door to knock on
    before she drove home in defeat.
    
    Scully hugged her arms against her and began to walk up the drive. She
    attempted to tame her wild hair by tucking it behind her ears. She
    slowly trotted her way up the three small steps to the door, and,
    taking a deep breath, knocked.
    
    And she waited.
    
    After a minute, she knocked again, harder. Still nothing.
    
    Finally she threw herself at the door. She was sure he was here, she
    was sure of it. She banged her fist against the worn wood, tears
    spilling from her eyes. Exhaustion and stress caught up with her. "No!
    NO! MULDER!" Her body slid down the door as she heaved in convulsive
    sobs. She had hoped so hard, prayed and wished. For anything, anyone.
    Even for a new tenant to have a clue as to where he might have gone.
    But no, nothing.
    
    Scully melted into a sobbing mass on the front porch. She had no
    energy and could not force herself to move. As her sobs subsided she
    told herself that she would get up, and at least make it to the car.
    But soon enough her eyelids drooped with exhaustion.

* * *
    
    
    xxxxxxxx
    
    He knew that it wasn't the best area of the city, but he didn't expect
    t find a bum on his doorstep. Juggling an overflowing bag of groceries
    in one hand, he fished for his keys in his pocket while trying to
    decide how to deal with this vagrant.
    
    It's stringy brown hair and dirty jeans and windbreaker showed no sign
    of age, but rather use. And she, or at least he assumed it was a she,
    was small. From his car he wondered if she was a runaway, looking for
    the former inhabitants of his apartment, but his mind told him he was
    being too creative, and should just politely ask her to leave his
    doorstep.
    
    As he got closer, though, his heart began to pound. The form was so
    familiar.  The hair no longer brown, but a very dirty red. His mind
    told him he was inventing things; that he was seeing what he wanted
    to. He shielded his face with the groceries as he got closer. "Excuse
    me, Miss," he ignored the thumping in his heart as he approached her.
    "You need to leave."
    
    Scully, only half-conscious, heard the voice. She heard the monotone
    she knew so well, but only registered the words. With a sigh she
    whipped her hair away from her face. Her voice was tired and horse as
    she spoke. Slowly she got to her feet. "I'm sorry. I was, uh, looking
    for someone, but he's not here. I'll be on my way."
    
    He stopped, his limbs went limp and he dropped the groceries. Scully,
    already half way to her car slowly turned to help him. "I'm sorry, let
    me help you."  She was so ashamed, so embarrassed that she wouldn't
    raise her eyes.
    
    But he could see her. As she bent down to pick up his jar of peanut
    butter that slowly rolled toward her feet, he saw her perfect roman
    nose, rosebud lips and her veiled eyes. She was worn and battered, but
    it was her. She had come for him, just like he always hoped. She was
    so out of it, so exhausted, that she had no idea. He couldn't move,
    was stunned and ecstatic. He just watched as she slowly approached
    him, her eyes lowered, and her arms bearing bananas and peanut butter.
    He couldn't move, couldn't utter a word until she was barely a foot
    away from him. Slowly she held out her arms and offered the fallen
    foods. Then he said it.
    
    "Scully?" was his breathless whisper.
    
    She dropped the groceries herself as her eyes widened and her jaw fell
    open.  Her head tipped up ever so slowly until she was looking
    straight into his eyes. "Mulder...." She was in shock and disbelief.
    "Mulder...."
    
    Wordlessly they both crossed the foot between them and crashed into
    each other, grasping on for dear life. Mulder smoothed her hair back
    and pulled her closer to him, "Scully," He whispered as the smile on
    his face grew. He planted tiny kisses on her forehead, and he feat
    tears slip from his eyes.
    
    "Oh, Thank God, Mulder. Mulder." Scully clutched him for dear life.
    Her hands quickly went to either side of his face and her eyes flew up
    to his. She searched his face, searched his features. She knew this
    man like no other. He was the missing piece to her soul, and now, she
    was again complete.
    
    Mulder's eyes searched hers, searched her face, and his thumb quickly
    went to her cheeks to wipe away the tears he saw there. Then, he
    couldn't wait any longer. He had to kiss her, he needed to feel her
    lips under his, to feel that they were real, that he wasn't just
    dreaming like he had dome every night since they'd parted.
    
    Suddenly she felt his lips on hers, and she leaned into them,
    frantically returning the kiss. Her mind went back to cold, lonely
    nights where all she could think of was his kiss. Breathless, she
    pulled away, a smile on her lips.  She had done it, she had found him.
    
    "Come inside." He could barely breathe, but he knew that it would be
    dangerous for them to stay outside much longer. Still looking at her,
    he found the key in his pocket and opened the door. She followed him
    insides, and as he closed the door, he took her again into his arms.
    "Scully, my God, what are you doing here?" He kissed her head. "How
    did you find me?"
    
    "I had to Mulder." Her voice was muddled with exhaustion and sleep.
    her eyes were already closed. "It's all gone to hell, Mulder. I needed
    to find you. I couldn't fail." She paused, emotion catching in her
    throat. "For a while there I thought I did." She stepped back from
    him. She needed to tell him about William. At first, she saw concern
    in his eyes, but then she saw his expression change to fear as her
    world went black.
    
    xxxxxxxxx

* * *
    
    
    She could feel warm, strong arms around her. She was encased in
    something soft, something warm. She could feel him pressed against
    her, held to him. Her skin felt clean and her hair cascaded softly
    around her face. She had dreamt this dream before, and she learned not
    to try to wake up, because he was never really there, and she always
    woke up cold and alone.
    
    Then she felt his arm caress hers, and she knew she wasn't dreaming.
    She moaned, and she could feel him move in reaction. She snuggled
    closer to his chest, elated that she was with him. She felt his arms
    tighten around her, and she slowly opened her eyes. There was his
    beautiful face, unchanged, staring at her from across the pillow.
    	
    "You scared me there, Scully." His hand went to her face, brushing
    back her now strawberry hair. He paused, waiting fir her to say
    something, but when he saw shame and discomfort in her eyes, he
    changed the subject. "I hope you don't mind, I gave you a bath. You
    were semi-conscious, but you really needed one." He paused again,
    stumbling on his words. "Not that you smelled or anything, but you
    looked like you'd appreciate one. And I didn't have any clothes for
    you, so I did the best I could."
    
    Scully smiled awkwardly as she looked under the blanket to see a pair
    of cotton boxers and a New York Yankees T-shirt clothing her,
    "Thanks." she looked up to him. " I didn't get a lot of time to spend
    in fancy hotels.  You're a hard man to find."
    
    "That was kind of the point."
    
    Scully's eyes clouded over. "But I needed to. I..." She got chocked up
    again, tears springing to her eyes, "I couldn't keep him safe, Mulder.
    Even you staying away couldn't keep him safe. I failed, Mulder. I
    failed." She threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his
    chest.
    
    "Scully, tell me. Tell me what happened." His mind was running frantic
    now. He knew it was not a good idea to leave them, but he would have
    done anything to save his son. "Tell me Scully." His words and tone
    were soothing, but his thoughts were of catastrophe.
    
    Slowly, she recounted the visit of Jeffrey Spender. Her certainty that
    it wasn't him, but the nagging question in her mind that it could be.
    She explained the events that sent William into the hospital, and
    ultimately, into the home of another couple. All the while, Mulder
    held her, and carefully listened.
    
    His heart seemed to stop when she told him that she gave William up
    for adoption. His only son, and he would never see him again. But,
    faced with the alternative, a life such as his, Mulder not only wished
    his son happiness, but was proud of Scully for making a choice that he
    could not have made.
    
    His words were soft as he began to speak, choked with emotion. "You
    didn't fail. You did what you had to do. You... You did something that
    I never could have done. And you thought about what he needed more
    than what you needed."
    
    "But why does it feel so wrong? So horrible?"
    
    "I don't know. I just don't." They held each other silently.
    Possibilities ran through Mulder's mind. I William was normal; he'd
    have a wonderful life, free of fear. And, if William was safe, Mulder
    could come home. He could go home.  He could be with Scully. The loss
    of William was a crushing blow, but it somehow made it okay, as long
    as he would be safe. And Scully obviously needed him now.
    
    "Mulder, there's still something that I didn't tell you." Her voice
    was pained and her head was buried in his shoulder.
    
    "What?"
    
    "I, um. I couldn't risk being followed. I couldn't risk your life.
    So..." She hesitated. He wasn't going to like this.
    
    "I know." His words were not happy, but they were matter-of-fact and
    worried.
    
    "How?"
    
    "When I was washing your hair. I saw the scab." He paused. "You
    shouldn't have done that, Scully. You really shouldn't have. My life's
    not worth yours."
    
    "To me it is."
    
    "How long?"
    
    "About four weeks."
    
    "Where is it?"
    
    "Agent Doggett has it."
    
    Mulder nodded, and kissed her forehead. He wasn't going to tell her
    about the nosebleed she had suffered while she was unconscious. but he
    was very worried.  The chip worked once. There was no guarantee that
    it would work again. "Get some sleep. We'll leave in the morning."
    
    "Leave?" Her voice was already heavy with sleep.
    
    "Back to DC."
    
    "No, Mulder, it might not be safe..."
    
    "You're not going to win this, Scully. We're going back, together."
    
    There was a pause, a heavy question in the air. He was waiting for her
    to fight back. But all she said was a soft, "Thank you, Mulder." He
    knew things must be bad if she relinquished control so easily.
    
    xxxxxxxxx

* * *
    
    
    When Scully woke up, she was alone in the bed. An early morning light
    streamed through the windows and she shielded her eyes. She must have
    slept at least 12 hours, if not more. The last day, the last few days
    were a blur to her. But where was Mulder? Did he leave her? Ditch her?
    Did she imagine all of it?
    
    No, she couldn't have imagined all of it. She was cleaner, and wearing
    new clothes. As she sat up, she heard the running of water from
    someplace close.  It sounded fast, like a shower. She couldn't
    remember the last time she took a real shower, one that had real warm
    water and in a stall that was clean. She got up and slowly followed
    the sound of the water. As she passed the kitchen, she stopped in and
    took a doughnut out of the box on the counter. It wasn't exactly
    fresh, but it seemed like gourmet to her. She was soon at the door to
    the bathroom, and indeed he was showering inside. The steam rose out
    of the crack below the door and beckoned her.
    
    As she finished the doughnut and licked her fingers, she contemplated
    just walking right in there and Joining Mulder under the hot water.
    Sure, he had cleaned her off last night, but she still felt grimy.
    And, she knew, that there were some places that he didn't clean for
    fear of not being a gentleman.  She wanted to be clean right now. She
    needed to feel the warm shower rain upon her and the dirt and grime
    slide off her body.
    
    Quietly she turned the knob and entered the bathroom. She closed the
    door to stop the steam from escaping. Mulder poked a soapy head around
    the shower curtain. He smiled at her, wiping suds from his forehead
    and back into his hair. "I'll, uh, be out in a minute. You can help
    yourself in the kitchen..."
    
    "Already did." Scully said as she began to undress. "And I don't want
    to wait- I want to be clean now..." Her actions didn't seem sexual,
    nor did her mind tell her they should be. Yet, Mulder was faced with a
    very real fantasy right in front of him; the woman, the love that he
    had dreamed of every night for almost a year had come back to him.
    
    Scully stepped into the shower in front of Mulder, stepping directly
    below the running water. Mulder just watched as her face relaxed and a
    look of ecstasy appeared as she let the heated liquid drip down her
    body. He was aroused, but not fully. For some reason, there was a
    feeling in the pit of his stomach that something was wrong, not whole.
    He wanted to make love to her, but there was a feeling of dread that
    kept him from responding.
    
    Scully turned her back to him to allow the water to pour down her face
    and chest. Mulder stepped into her body, cradling her naked form to
    him. His arms went around her, one around her belly, the other around
    her shoulders. Scully placed her hands on his, and leaned into his
    embrace. She leaned her head to his shoulder and just stayed there the
    warm water falling onto them.
    
    xxxxxxxx

* * *
    
    
    Their shower had been a beautiful thing, Mulder mused. He was quite
    confused as to why his body had not reacted as he thought it would. By
    all means, had it been any other time, he would have made love to her.
    But he hadn't felt it, the lust or the need. But he knew he still
    loved her, and knew that his lack of primal needs was not from lack of
    love. He was packing what little there was to pack as Scully tried to
    piece together something to wear from his wardrobe.
    
    He pulled out the alarm clock, his address book, and a few
    knick-knacks out of the drawer and placed them in the bag. Then he
    went back for the last thing, the last thing he always packed so he
    would see it the longest: a picture of Scully and William. Frohike had
    sent it to him. It was a bit grainy, and William was less than a month
    old, but it was all that he had of them for so long.
    
    And then he knew what was missing, what had caused the feeling of
    dread and emptiness in his stomach. Tears silently rolled down his
    face for the loss of his son. Poor William, whom he knew only briefly,
    was a pawn in this game, not by choice, but by birth. How could they
    have been so stupid to think that he would be anything else? How could
    they have hoped that he would make it all go away?
    
    And suddenly he was angry, so angry that she had given him up. So
    angry that she didn't come to find him. He was filled with rage that
    he had fought so hard for a child, one that he desperately wanted now,
    and it was all for naught. Will would not fill their lives, he would
    not complete Scully. She had thrown that away. He couldn't stand the
    thought of what happened, and rage bubbled within him. With a
    strangled roar, he hurled the picture across the room.
    
    It flew as if in slow motion. It sailed across the room, and hit a
    wall. The wooden frame cracked and the glass shattered into tiny
    shards. As he watched the anger melted from his face. He ran across
    the room and tried to put it back together, to replace the only
    picture of William he would ever have. The photo was crumpled, he
    straightened it, and didn't notice when blood began to drip from cuts
    on his hands. He became frantic, the picture symbolizing all he had
    ever really wanted; a stable family, a happy life, and a reason to
    wake up in the morning. His hands, blood covered and shredded by the
    glass shards he chose to ignore, worked furiously to try to piece the
    frame back together.
    
    "Mulder!" Scully swung herself around the doorframe to the bedroom.
    She had heard his cry and came running. She saw the blood, and
    Mulder's tear streaked form lying over the glass and ran to him, a
    gasp on her lips. "Oh my God, Mulder, what did you do?" She lifted his
    hands, and carefully pulled the picture from them. She began to pull
    out the larger chunks of glass with her finger nails as he tried to
    speak.
    
    "He... Scully... I..." He was breathless and panicked, tears flying
    down his cheeks. She lifted one of her hands from his, wiped the blood
    spots off on the towel that held her hair, and began to push unruly
    locks from his forehead while wiping tears away.
    
    "Breathe Mulder, just breathe in and out." She caressed his face, and
    slowly the panic fled, replaced by infinite sadness. After a few
    tries, he looked her dead in the eyes and spoke.
    
    "William." Tears flooded his eyes again, and without another word,
    Scully knew exactly how he felt. Tears flooded her eyes as well, and
    they slowly reached for each other. Together, they sank to the floor,
    a tangled mass of arms and legs, and cried for their son; a pawn in a
    game he was never meant to play.
    
    xxxxxxxxxx

* * *
    
    
    The X-Files Office was a melancholy tableau; John Doggett a shell of
    himself.  After receiving Scully's note, He had called Skinner and
    Reyes. They tried to find her for a few days, but Skinner convinced
    them that it was a lost cause.  If Scully did not want to be found,
    she wouldn't be. So, he kept the small vile with him at all times,
    protecting what could be her only salvation. Day after day he sat,
    going through potential X-Files, a frown on his face.
    
    Today was no different, he sat at his desk, jacket off and his sleeves
    rolled up, mindlessly reading a report from the Midwest about a
    man-eating jack rabbit. The phone rang, and he grabbed it, happy for
    any distraction. "Hello?"
    
    "Agent Doggett? It's Mrs. Scully."
    
    "Hi Mrs. Scully, how are you?"
    
    "Oh, not bad today. Has there been any word?"
    
    "No, not yet. You know I told you I'd call."
    
    "I know, but I feel like I need to do something."
    
    "I know, Mrs. Scully. Call as often as you like."
    
    "Thank you, Agent Doggett. Thank you."
    
    "Goodbye."
    
    "Goodbye."
    
    Doggett put the phone down, and leaned back in his chair, thinking.
    Before he got very far the phone rang again. "Hello?"
    
    "Agent Doggett? It's Mulder."
    
    Doggett stood in his surprise. "Mulder? Where have you been?"
    
    "That's not important right now, what's important-"
    
    "No, it's very important, Scully went looking for you, her life-"
    
    "She's with me, Doggett. We're on our way back. I need you to meet us
    at the Lone Gunmen office."
    
    "OK, I'm on my way."
    
    "Don't forget the chip."
    
    "Not on your life."
    
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

* * *
    
    
    "MULDER!" Scully called across the apartment from her bedroom.
    
    "I'm coming!" He yelled as he jogged from the living room to her, "I'm
    coming, what's the matter?" He walked in the room and to her bedside;
    she lay in bed, sweat laden and her face scrunched up in pain.
    
    "It hurts, Mulder. It hurts so badly..."
    
    He climbed up on the bed and gathered her into his arms. "Where?"
    
    She curled into a ball in his embrace. "Everywhere."
    
    "And you have a headache?" He caressed the hair away from her face,
    and his thumb automatically went to her temple and started to rub
    soothing circles.  She only grunted in pain in response to his
    question, but moaned softly as he began to massage her.
    
    Since they'd reinserted the chip, she'd suffered debilitating pain. He
    insisted on taking her to the hospital, and the MRI showed that her
    tumor had reappeared, but after a week, another scan had shown that it
    was getting smaller. It's been almost two weeks since they'd
    reinserted the chip, and she'd escalated from a bad headache, to
    migraine, to debilitating pain. Mulder figured that she had started to
    get better, she no longer was lying in the fetal position, any
    movement causing her pain. She as able to eat a little now, too.
    
    "It'll all be over soon, Scully. It will, and we'll never have to go
    thought this again."
    
    Scully painfully wound her arms around Mulder, and held on tightly.
    
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

* * *
    
    
    Five years later
    
    The red, white, and blue pennants flew freely in the cool breeze. The
    sun was almost down, but the little league field was completely
    illuminated by the field's lights. The stands on the first and third
    base lines were filled with parents and kids; some parents in casual
    wear, some fresh from the office, but everyone's eyes glued on the
    field. The kids ran about, some playing catch, other just chasing each
    other.
    
    A little boy with a black shirt walked up to the plate. The coach
    behind him placed the ball on the tee, and the boy swung the bat with
    obvious conviction.  Everyone in the stands cheered when he hit it,
    and as he scrambled to first base. The boys in the field, clad in
    green shirts, scrambled to get the ball.  The boy in black took first
    just as the boy at third base held up the ball in victory.
    
    They walked across the park, holding each other's hand. Her stomach
    rumbled with nerves, and his wasn't much better. They approached the
    green teams bleachers as the boy fielding the pitchers mound caught
    the ball and threw it to first. The first baseman missed it, and the
    batter took first, jumping up and down in victory.
    
    "Well. hi there." A plump woman with a smile on her face greeted the
    pair.  They were unfamiliar to her. She peeked over at the game, then
    back at them.  She was a petite red-head, her hair held back loosely
    by a clip, he was taller with dark hair hidden by a baseball cap. They
    were both dresses casually, jeans and t-shirts, she had sunglasses on.
    They seemed interested in the game, but she didn't recall ever seeing
    them before, and seeing as there were only 4 tee-ball teams in the
    town, she would have recalled if they were someone's parents. "I'm
    Arlene Van de Kamp."
    
    "Hi, I'm William, this is my wife Katherine."
    
    "It's nice to meet you." She extended her hand and they both shook it.
    She tactfully broached her worry, it wasn't that she was afraid of the
    people in front of her, but in this town, it wasn't often they saw
    strangers, especially hanging around the little league field. "I'm
    sorry, you're not familiar. Is your little boy on the other team?"
    
    'Katherine' seemed to be uncomfortable, but shrugged it away. She put
    her arm around her husband before speaking. "No, Mrs. Van de Kamp.
    Actually, we were looking at a house nearby, and we saw this going,
    decided to stop. Our son will be six soon, and this looks like
    something he might enjoy."
    
    "Oh, how wonderful! You were probably seeing the old Gardener place.
    Was it on Dontan Street?" Arlene calmed down, and kept one eye on the
    game, and one ear on the gossip. She loved to keep in touch with what
    was going on in the town.
    
    "William" shifted his weight and tipped his cap to keep the sun out of
    his eyes. "Yeah, that's the place. It was gorgeous. This seems to be a
    great town, a great place to bring up kids." There was a hint of
    something in his voice that Arlene wasn't able to catch, it was a
    technique, and he was asking a question without ever asking one.
    Something an investigator would do.
    
    "Oh, it's just wonderful. Will, my son, is so happy here." Arlene
    missed the deep intake of breath the woman took and the emotion that
    passed over the man's eyes. She was busy searching for him in the
    field. "He's over there, playing left field. Well, actually he's more
    interested in the bunny over by the trees it seems. But he's a pretty
    good hitter when it's his turn."  She smiled back at the couple. "It
    really is a great town. Nice and quiet, a safe place for the kids to
    play, good schools."
    
    "Yeah, we're glad we got to see it." Katherine's words were almost
    brimming over with emotion, but she was trying to hide it. Arlene
    thought better of exposing it. 'William' knew exactly what was wrong
    though.
    
    "Well, we better be off, but, just another question-"
    
    "Sure, in a second, my son's up at bat... could you just wait a
    second?"
    
    "William" Her voice was chocked with emotion, "Of course."
    
    Will got up to the place, and concentrated hard. His Cupid's bow muoth
    was drawn in concentration. His nose had gotten a little bigger,
    almost a tad to big for his face. His hair was brown, poking out from
    his baseball cap, but tiny red highlights could be seen in the sun.
    His eyes were a light hazel, and his face had his father's intense
    look of concentration. He swung, and smacked the ball right to center
    field. All the kids ran for the Ball and William ran for first base.
    
    Arlene jumped out of the bleacher, clapping her hands and screaming.
    William looked from first base at her, and smiled a child's smile-
    missing teeth and all.
    
    She couldn't take it any more. She turned and ran. He took a look, and
    saw Mrs. Van de Kamp engrossed in Will, and made a mad dash to catch
    up with his wife. Once inside their silver SUV, she said only one
    thing as she wiped the tears from underneath her dark sunglasses.
    "Drive."
    
    A few minutes passed by, and once they were on the interstate he dared
    to open his mouth to her silent tears.
    
    "Scully?" It was soft, questioning yet understanding. He heard her
    sniff, and looked over. She slowly removed her sunglasses to show that
    her eyes were red and puffy.
    
    A sad, defeated smile came to her face. "At least," emotion choked
    her, but she continued, "at least he's happy." Mulder reached a hand
    over and grabbed hers, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
    
    "It's what we wanted." His voice was hoarse, a plethora of feelings
    leaving him confused; yet somehow bereft. "I know that now it seems so
    simple, it seems so easy to say that we could have kept him, Scully.
    But things have happened that we could have never have counted on. Who
    could have foreseen that Kersh was working from the inside? That when
    Cancer man died, that Spender was working to overthrow the conspiracy?
    How could we have known about the vaccine?" He looked at her, a tear
    spilling from his eye. "But the fact still remains, Scully, that for
    whatever reason, they wanted him. If you kept him, you never would
    have come to find me. If you kept him, they would have never left him
    alone. Just because we think that it's the end, it may not be.  There
    are still so many things we don't know."
    
    "I know, Mulder." She squeezed his hand. "but I keep thinking, that
    could be me, sitting in those stands, cheering for my baby, watching
    you coaching him.  I just keep thinking about all the thing I missed,
    and will miss."
    
    "Think about the life he'll live, Scully. It's a life we might not
    have been able to give him."
    
    "Do you think he'll ever know? Do you think he'll understand?"
    
    "If we succeed, he'll never know. And I pray that's how it is, Scully.
    I pray no one knows the sacrifices we've had to make for their sake.
    We're so close to having it be all over."
    
    They both focused on the road ahead for a few silent moments.
    
    "It'll never be over, Mulder. We'll never be able to have a normal
    family.  I'll never take a little girl to ballet lessons and you'll
    never have one-on-one's in the back yard with our son."
    
    Mulder gave her hand a gentle squeeze, he could see the tears welling
    up in her eyes again. "Don't say that, Scully. Don't be so
    pessimistic. There's always a chance. You have to believe."
    
    "I want to believe."
    

 


End file.
